Dating Culture and its Impact on Marriage

Dating Culture and its Impact on Marriage

Today's definition of "dating" has drastically changed. In the culture of our time, we have begun to think that we are in fact dating someone when in reality all we are doing is "hanging out" and "hooking up". To understand why this change is negative and how it will impact you in the future, we must first learn what the difference between the two is.

What Classifies as a Date

If you have ever been asked to describe your perfect first date, chances are you won't say "sitting on the couch, watching a movie and not talking or getting to know them". Who would want a first date like that?! If you answered "uh well I do" then maybe you need a little more understanding on why that's so bad.

It is feasible why so many people get what dating is so confused, for the sake of our argument we are going to assign the word "date" to a fixed definition.

date¹

/dāt/

Learn to pronounce

noun

1. 1.

   a planned activity dedicated to getting to know another individual

   "would you like to go on a date to get some ice cream with me?"

   
   

1. Dates should have only two intentions, to spend time with and get to know an individual better. Too often our generation asks someone out with the intention of "hooking up". This habit and pattern of dating are what leads to unpreparedness for marriage and a misguided approach on the subject.
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The Wrong View on Marriage

This generation has grown up in a society saturated in divorce. This has come to cause us to have pessimism about our chances of having a happy marriage. Everyone hopes for a happy and loving companion, we have high aspirations for what we want, yet very low expectations that we will actually achieve it. This has led to a common habit or view on marriage, that we are only ready to get married when we have decided we are finished being single. A recent study showed that young adults have said that they wish to "fully experience the single life" and feel it is an important prerequisite to marriage (Carroll, Badger, Willoughby, Nelson, Madsen, & Barry, 2009). This take on marriage has created casual dating habits: dating for fun rather than the intent of creating a meaningful relationship, cohabitation (or living together), not dating seriously until "marriage ready" (i.e. being financially stable, done being single, being personally independent, and self-reliant. 

This is a wrong view on marriage. Studies have shown that people who establish a strong sense of personal independence have a harder time connecting with a spouse. The financial goals that emerging adults desire to accomplish before marriage are milestones in a marriage that will bring the couple closer together and establish a stronger unity between the two.

In the future of this blog, we will discuss bad marriage preparation habits and how it affects the foundation of the relationship. We will also introduce healthy patterns and preparation skills to develop a healthy, happy, and successful marriage. 

Thank you all for reading my first ever blog post! I hope you stay tuned to learn some new things you may not have known about dating, marriage, or relationships in general. If you have any topics or questions feel free to mention them on this site.

Thanks again!

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